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Worldwide Pleb

by Rupert Ramon

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1.
My hair's a mess and I can hardly speak I've broken both my arms because I'm weak I'm a plebian, I'm a plebian, I'm a plebian, I'm a plebian I'm an imbecile, a cretin and a dreg My eyes are closed and I've broken both my legs I'm a plebian, I'm a plebian, I'm a plebian, I'm a plebian I live in my plebian house I breathe through my plebian mouth I eat with my plebian hands And I've formed my own plebian band
2.
Your Trash 02:02
3.
Tippexing out art world lies Pissing in Charles Saatchi's eyes Spitting on Carl Andre's bricks STOP REWARDING VIOLENT DICKS Art is revolting, art is revolting Your patronage is just insulting Art is revolting, art is revolting Galleries could not give two fucks Praying that the market unfurls Canonising the Guerrilla Girls Selling off all Picasso's crap And dumping the profits in an ARI's lap Art is revolting, art is revolting Your patronage is just insulting Art is revolting, art is revolting Galleries could not give two fucks Art is revolting, art is revolting Your patronage is just insulting Art is revolting, art is revolting It's not only George who is a cunt
4.
Binman 01:06
5.
If you want more energy And you're not what you're supposed to be And all the nipples stand up in your mind If you have low salary The cast is not the scenery And you're not meaning to be bright If you want to stop If you want to quit If you want to leave Skip to the middle Skip to the middle If there is no sympathy For plastic mind surgery And all the wrecked bums play golf in your eyes If you have a sock to pee The last one that you left for me [?????] If you want to stop If you want to quit If you want to leave Skip to the middle Skip to the middle If the raspberry greens to bleed The fist does refuse the beat And shouts out to have his own right Fist continues to be offbeat And rants its own flat in greek And now thinks aobut the might If you want to stop
6.
7.
Me + Julio 01:20
8.
Carsick Carl 02:53
Carl, have you taken your pill? If you don't have your medication you're going to get ill Carl, you're going to be fine But if we don't leave the driveway now we'll never make it on time Carl, what are you doing to me? We've only been gone ten minutes and you need a wee Carl, just be sick into this bag If you don't get it out of your system the journey will drag Carl, what's coming out of your nose? My upholstery is beige, please watch where your bleeding goes Carl, can I put the radio on? Listening to your heaving means my patience is gone
9.
They met while squabbling over a discarded plectrum on the floor of Brixton Academy on a bitterly cold night in 2001. As the triangular bit of red plastic left PJ Harvey's fingertips and arced over the bored row of security men, one of them lunged forward with an arm outstretched and collided with the other's shoulder, knocking them both to the floor, rolling around between the sweaty legs, scrabbling to claim the discarded prize like two pigeons fighting over a cigarette butt on the platform at Clifton Hill train station. They stayed down, and after the crowd had dispersed around them and exited into the night, they were still lying amongst the flattened plastic pint glasses, enthusing on what the songs meant to them, and eventually they decided that they would share the souvenir. On a monthly basis one would post the object to the other across the country, sellotaped to the back of a postcard or folded in between perfumed letter paper. In 2006 when they were old enough to have a civil partnership, they ceremoniously snapped the plectrum in half. Both pieces were placed in specially designed lockets intended to be worn around their necks forever as a symbol of their love. When they amicably decided to separate in 2015, and kissed goodbye for the final time at Gatwick Airport, the locket necklaces accidentally clinked together as they leaned forward into each other's mouths, and at the same time, a shudder went through Polly Jean, as she sat with an autoharp in her lap on a stool at Somerset House Studios. She looked down at her pale hands, for some reason expecting them to be streaming with blood, but they were completely dry, completely dry, drier than the leaves of an iceberg lettuce at a Pizza Hut all-you-can-eat salad bar.
10.

credits

released July 1, 2015

DON'T PAY THAT MUCH SILLY. PLEASE PURCHASE FROM: yntpm.bandcamp.com

Recorded at The Guilt Complex, Heidelberg, Australia except tracks 6 and 10 recorded at Porlock Vale Beach, Somerset, UK.

All songs written by Rupert Ramon except:
track 5 written by The Threw Ups;
track 7 written by Paul Simon;
track 10 written by Stewart Lee.

Produced by Tohmas Baltchfrod, who appears courtesy of Fulsome Prism Recordings.

Artwork by Carla Adams. Front cover designed by Rupert Ramon.

Released by You need to practice more. yntpm.tumblr.com

With thanks to Frances Piers, Plastic Knife, Hard Work Contemporary, Jenny Threw Up and Javid Basin.

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Rupert Ramon Melbourne, Australia

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